Writing is Hard - When a Dream has to Wait

This post has been reminding me that it needed to be written for a long, long while. This is not an admission of defeat. It is not me labeling myself a failure or having a pity party. This is just me, finally putting the cloud of thoughts into one mass. Maybe that way I can help myself by getting it out of my head. 

Writing is Hard. 
and
Sometimes a Dream has to Wait. 

Writing down my thoughts has never been difficult for me. Whether it be a journal entry, a school paper, or the quick-fire response to a forum post, I can always manage to put something down via my pen or my keyboard. So cranking out words to fill a void is not my problem. 

Stories have always been a sustenance for me. I thrive off good stories like I would thrive off good food. They fill me and keep me energized. Reading stories is an easily-accessible way to get this energy. But the treat is making my own stories. I've been doing that since I was little and I see no sign of ever ceasing in the telling of stories. They whirl in my head like displaced pieces waiting to be put into order. The characters pass through my mind like friend's I've met once upon a dream. They've gone on before me on their great adventures and I am just the recorder, following in the tracks they've left behind. 

But Writing is Hard 

Yes, I have the ability to write and appreciate stories. I can write blog posts and English papers and collaborate with others to create short stories. But my big dream, my big ambition to write my own novel....why is it taking so long?

It's November if a lot of you haven't noticed. In the writer-blogger sphere, that means one thing: NaNoWriMo. The National Writing Month. This month brings with it the challenge of completing an entire novel before November is out. There are clubs, forums, and tools like you wouldn't imagine available to help writers with this challenge. Year after year I've watched as online and in-real-life friends work hard and complete their books. Year after year I still haven't completed mine. It's hard to communicate the frustration with this. 

Writing is hard. Sometimes all the little articles and tools in the world won't write the book for you. It takes work, and I've put in a lot of work. But I get the feeling this baby of mine is going to take longer than a month of non-stop work to crank out. It's still deep within the planning and conceptualizing stages. I'm making progress, but sometimes I still feel like I've done nothing at all. 

And Sometimes a Dream has to Wait

School and life have a habit of happening. Other things take precedence over writing. I have to balance my school schedule with my social life and add writing in there somewhere. It happens that I have to wait another semester before taking college-level writing courses. It happens that I may not be able to finish out the Creative Writing Minor I've really looked forward to. 

The fears and doubts regularly crowd in. I was never meant to do this. What if I show my work to someone only to find out this isn't the gift God intended me to use? I'll never be successful at this. I'll never finish. Even if I do, no one will read it. 



If I only ever had those things pressing in on me I would stop writing altogether. I would cut myself off from the dream that has captivated my mind for years. If it were not for the friends that encourage me to write I would quit. If it were not for the ever-present sense of joy when I write I would put down my pen forever. The inspiration still flows and I still burn inside to put the words in my mind to paper. 

Writing is hard. Sometimes a dream has to wait. But that doesn't mean the dream will die. If a dream can endure the bumpy road then it is one worth chasing.  

Thanks for dealing with me while I rambled a bit today. I really do envy those of you who are doing so well this November with your novels. Has anyone else felt this frustration? Is anyone else having to put a story on hold? Encouragement, advice, even criticism are welcome in the comments below!